The Question

As we often do, Paul and I spent an hour on the phone discussing art, passion and the quest for perfection. We began to ponder if as artist, we would ever be able to look back at a piece of our work and be completely satisfied. Maybe the journey of creation is the fuel for our passion and thus needs to be enjoyed more. Heck maybe we just need to be more raw, productive and unafraid to reveal our process.

In the mid 80's, I was a teenager and Jean-Michel Basquiat was hot. I didn't get it. It wasn't until recently that I came upon some of his works that I saw something amazing. In work I had previously viewed as chaotic and random, I now see FREEDOM, FEARLESSNESS and passion. From a purely cultural standpoint I finally understand how the fire burned within the artist and he let it be. Maybe he hated some elements of his work and he covered it over with layer upon layer. The end result was the revelation of a complex process he was unashamed to show.

Robert Rodriguez made El Mariachi. I adore Robert on so many levels but. Come on! Basic story... The acting left something to be desired and technically... it was a C. But he DID IT, and he is my hero. This is not a review of either Basquiat's or Rodriguez's work. It is my epiphany. I have worked so hard to be in control of my fire that I have missed many opportunities. I was afraid of imperfection, criticism, or failure so I have tweaked and edited my work to the point of nonexistence. My results are like a nightmare that leaves me screaming without sound and paralyzed with a desire to run. So the question is do I wait for perfection or do I jump in and create and allow the evolution of things learned to not only transform my work but my very self?

El Cuento

Many of years ago, my mom took me to Puerto Rico and I made the mistake of asking our waiter for "el cuento." Mom explained that I’d asked the young man to "give me the story" or "spin me a tale." We laughed and I’ve been the one "telling and spinning" ever since. I wonder how you got here...

As I write this blog, I don’t know.

My partner Paul seems to think that my filmography may have something to do with it. For those of you who don’t know...
I used to be an actress. I am most recognized for my parts in Allison Anders’ film Mi Vida Loca and Robert Rodriguez’s Desperado. My most FAQ is: Why did I stop? There are so many reasons but only one lead to the creation of this site. PASSION. It exists in all humanity but for the artist, it is fuel. The very thing that wakes us in the morning and deprives us sleep at night. I was not passionate about acting. I was blessed to work and I wouldn’t trade the experience for the world BUT acting was a job. It wasn’t until I worked on Desperado and saw Robert editing on an NLE that I became fascinated with the digital world. I went back to school.

I fell in love with multimedia production. I began to compose stories in my mind. I met my friend and business partner Paul Martinez. An artist with PASSION who was stuck in a JOB. We decided to do our own thing and starve!

Today we own a small media production studio in Los Angeles. We design marketing tools. Sometimes I love what we do, sometimes it’s frustrating. This site is our baby. We have so many hopes for it. Paul and I want to share what we do. Not what we get PAID to do but what we must do to stay sane. Some will like it, some will hate it. In the end I hope it inspires you to be better at whatever you do. I would not be here if it weren’t for so many people who inspired me.

If Bullfighter’s Café thrives as a space that encourages creativity we will die happy. If you to create, I hope you will visit often and participate.